Jen Underwood

Arlington Heights, IL
@jenunderwoodthewriter
Survivor
Twist on Cancer: I learned how to balance “holding on” with “letting go.” On a First Descents whitewater adventure trip, the kayak instructors warned that “branches are not your friends.” They explained, we had 2 choices in whitewater: 1) paddle upright or 2) “flip and tuck.” If we flipped, we needed to get into the fetal position, wrap our arms around our knees, and surrender to the current. If we grabbed onto a side branch, we might decapitate our arms — the rapids and forward motion were stronger than our grasps. It was terrifying to fly down a river in the fetal position with a helmet, life jacket, and sandals. “How do I know when it’s safe again?” I asked the instructor. “The river always slows down somewhere,” he told me.
I am determined to keep moving forward — sometimes upright, sometimes swept along in terror. The only thing I know: I cannot cling to my old shorelines. My new journey includes writing and advocacy. In addition to my job as a psychotherapist, I became a freelance journalist and pain management advocate for female cancer patients. I paddle until I tip, because those are the only choices.